Do you ever find yourself doing all those little tricks to make wishes? Blowing out birthday candles, throwing change in a fountain, keeping good fortunes from fortune cookies, finding a shooting star, 11:11, praying to a certain deity.
I do it all the time, hoping and believing it’ll all get better. Normally my luck gets worse right after I do it, but something inside me tells me to keep it up.
My wish? It changes a little bit over time. Lately, I’ve been wishing to be on campus more. To be able to spend time with my friends later. To have more freedom. To meet new people. To spend more time with my dear boyfriend and feel more like a girlfriend to him by going to his events. To succeed in school.
Now that I look back, I realized some of these have already started to come true. I’ve met a few new people in my classes, not as many as I planned, but a lot of the people… don’t really click with me. I feel like I’m starting to connect more with my friends back home and I’m getting to know the Phi Delta Theta guys more. There’s so many nice guys in that frat that are so fun to talk to! They always make me feel at home when I’m there too. :) And school is definitely stressful this quarter, but I seem to be pulling out quite well. I spend hours upon hours on that stupid homework. Sometimes I don’t do as well as I wish I could have, but overall I think I’m getting it.
And now I’m full out looking for scholarships and study abroad programs. Indonesia may have shut down for political issues, but that won’t stop me from going to Asia! I still have Singapore, Malaysia, and Japan to apply for! I’m definitely going to see the advisers too.
Okay okay, getting back to what I was originally saying. I think all of that wishing has finally paid off. I have to thank my sister for this. She’s been struggling in school and her grades have been dropping. Nobody is home to help her during the day because my parents work and I’m at school then my mom has to pick me up from the transit station. She finally had enough and complained and my dad said there’s a bus that I can take to his work and we can carpool home together. And then my mom can help my sister do her homework and fix up the whole because nobody else is.
What that means for me? I get to stay on campus later now. I can spend more hours straight on homework so I can focus. I can meet up with friends at better times for lunch. I can join clubs. Sometimes, I’ll leave early, but if I want to, I can stay for Kaness’s events. I can go to his dinners, his pumpking carving thing, anything. I can finally feel like his girlfriend and he doesn’t have to constantly tell his friends I’m not there because of the commuting and other problems. How is this even possible? Something has to go wrong. I’m so freaking happy, I’m on the brink of tears and all I want to do is see Kaness right now and give him the biggest hug.